A Contrarian's Guide to Knowing God: Spirituality for the Rest of Us Paperback - 2007

Excerpt

SPIRITUALITY FOR THE REST OF US
I ’ve noticed that much (if not most) teaching on spirituality is a lot like books I’ve read on marriage.
My wife and I always thought we had a great one until we started reading books and going to the conferences designed to tell us how to have a great marriage. We viewed our relationship as characterized by oneness of spirit, soul, and mind—a connectedness that made two truly become one. But the books and conferences informed us that we were doing it all wrong. We weren’t eating enough meals together, the TV was on too much, our date nights were far too rare, and our prayer time as a couple was sorely lacking. The message was clear: The fact that we had a strong marriage didn’t matter; how we got there was what mattered most. And we’d apparently gotten there the wrong way.
Their tools for building a great marriage had somehow become the measure of a great marriage.
And on that scale, we didn’t measure up.


COOKIE-CUTTER CHRISTIANS
When it comes to having a great relationship with God, the same thing often happens. The tools and spiritual disciplines that can help us get there frequently become an end in themselves. Books and conferences on the inner life end up presenting a cookie-cutter approach to spirituality that focuses more on the steps we take than on the actual quality of our walk with God. The emphasis of this book is that God wants a great relationship with all of us, but it can’t be found in a one-size-fits-all approach.
It’s the end result that matters, not the path we take to get there. If something produces a great walk with God for you, it’s a great path to take. If not, it’s probably a waste of time, even if lots of other folks highly recommend it. Fact is, what works for one can be worthless—even harmful— for another. The way we’re wired really matters. Whenever we project what works for us onto everyone else, we create frustration and legalism. When we let others project their stuff onto us we too often end up with unfounded guilt or a nervous twitch. Neither of which is very helpful when it comes to producing a great relationship with God.

DOES GOD PLAY FAVORITES?
As a new Christian, the more I pursued what it meant to know God and experience genuine spirituality, the more I found many of the standard answers confusing. The conventional paths to pleasing God seemed heavily tilted in the direction of certain personality types. The playing field didn’t appear to be level. I wondered if God played favorites. On the one hand, I was told that spirituality was within the reach of everyone. On the other hand, I noticed that almost all the books on spirituality and the inner life were
written by introverts—smart ones at that. I got the distinct impression that God was somehow partial to reflective types with high IQs, impressive vocabularies, and lots of self-discipline. And that left a lot of us on the outside looking in.

DO GOOD READERS MAKE BETTER CHRISTIANS?
I also noticed that reading seemed to be rather important. I’m obviously not down on reading, or why write a book? But I’m not quite sure how the ability to read well became the essential tool for
spiritual growth. If I want to know God and experience genuine spirituality, I’m told to read the Bible daily. If I want to grow really deep, I’m told to also read the time-honored classics written by the saints of old.
Now, I know the Bible is important; no argument there. But if daily Bible reading and mining the depths of the ancient scholars and mystics is the key to knowing God and God-pleasing spirituality, I wonder how regular folks got there before Gutenberg invented his printing press? Even more to the point, if reading skills are so vital, how can my friend Tony, who’s severely dyslexic, ever hope to know God?

DO BIBLE SCHOLARS MAKE BETTER CHRISTIANS?
I was also puzzled by our widespread emphasis on proper doctrine as central to having a good relationship with God. I want to make it clear that I personally believe theology and sound doctrine are important—incredibly important. What I believe about God has an undeniable impact on how I live. Wrong thinking leads to wrong decisions; always has, always will. But didn’t Jesus say something about the kingdom of heaven belonging to those who are like little children? If he really meant it, how does our insistence on sound doctrine being essential for knowing and pleasing God fit in with a child’s theological naiveté? Anyone who has ever been around a children’s Sunday school class knows that these kids have some pretty messed-up theology. They haven’t got a clue about propitiation, the Trinity, or any of
the other important doctrines of Scripture. If asked, they’ll say the darnedest things.
But as Jesus pointed out, many of them can and do have a great relationship with God—and often, a relationship worth emulating. That’s caused me to wonder if sound doctrine is perhaps more the result of knowing and pleasing God than the primary and indispensable first step before he shows up.

WHEN THE MOLD DOESN’T FIT
Finally, I wondered why I kept running across so many godly people who felt so ungodly.
I now realize it had more to do with our faulty definitions of spirituality than anything else. In most cases, these people felt like spiritual failures not because they were far from God, but because they’d been unable to live up to generally accepted measures of spirituality.
They had stalled out in Leviticus each time they tried to read through the Bible. They were kinetic types who found extended prayer not only unfulfilling, but nearly torturous. Or extroverts who’d bought one of those fancy leather journals, but never got around to putting anything in it.
Mostly, they were regular folks who for whatever reason didn’t fit the mold too well. They tried it, but sadly found it didn’t work for them.

A CONTRARIAN’S PERSPECTIVE
As we explore what it means to know God and experience Godpleasing spirituality in a way that’s accessible for everyone, you’ll notice that we take some admittedly contrarian paths. But rest assured, they’re not contrarian for contrarian’s sake. If that were the case, they would have no value. Contrarian thinking for the sake of being contrarian is an arrogant waste of time. Claiming that the world is flat just because everyone else says it’s round is a fool’s playground. There’s nothing wrong with conventional wisdom when it’s right. And most of the time it is. But when it’s not, someone has to speak up.
Contrarian thinking at its best simply asks, Is that really true? And it speaks up when the politically correct answer or conventional wisdom doesn’t match reality—when things don’t work the way
everyone says they do or thinks they do. Contrarianism also represents a much-needed form of candor. It dares to speak the unspeakable, to voice what others may have been thinking but for some reason have been afraid to say out loud. Much like a young boy standing by the roadside asking, “Why is the emperor butt naked?” That’s the kind of thinking, candor, and courage I hope you’ll find on the pages to follow. My bet is that you’ll find some of it incredibly freeing, some of it annoying, some maddening, and some of it still open to debate.

Contrarian thinking
at its best simply asks,
Is that really true?

I also hope you’ll find yourself thinking more than a few times, “You know, I always thought the same thing—but I didn’t know anybody else did too.”

Media reviews

"What a great, fun book! Larry Osborne’s A Contrarian’s Guide made me cringe at certain intersections; at other times I felt the thrill of someone putting into words what I’ve always felt. He takes the cookies off the top shelf and puts them where we all can enjoy them, as he finishes our incomplete sentences and makes us feel like geniuses.
It’s a quick read that’s filled with brilliant, disturbing insights. He may not change stodgy theologians, but he may just annoy them closer to Jesus."

-WAYNE CORDEIRO, Coauthor of Culture Shift, Senior Pastor, New Hope Christian Fellowship, O’ahu Honolulu


"Larry Osborne hits it out of the park with A Contrarian’s Guide to Knowing God. Practical and engaging, this book calls each of us to a new way of thinking about what it means to build a great relationship with God. It does what every great book has always done: It causes some of us relief, it causes some of us great consternation, and it causes all of us to stop and think about what we’re doing and why we’re doing it. The concepts Larry shares have blessed and encouraged me as a follower of Christ and a leader in His church. I will definitely move this book to the top of my must-read list for our church family."

-TOBY SLOUGH, Author of Living the Dream and The Great Adventure, Senior Pastor, Cross Timbers Community Church, Argyle, Texas


"This is a refreshingly helpful book for everyone who loves Jesus but has struggled with tidy formulas for spiritual growth."

-MARK DRISCOLL, Author of The Radical Reformission, Cofounder and President, Acts 29 Church Planting Network, Founder, Mars Hill Church, Seattle


"Rich wisdom brilliantly communicated by a very talented writer. Takes the blinders off and opens your eyes to some strange and unique ways God works."

-STEPHEN ARTERBURN, Author of The Secrets Men Keep, Founder and Chairman, New Life Ministries, Radio Cohost of New Life Live


"This book will speak to everyone who has ever felt “left out” spiritually. Larry’s insights cut through the commonly accepted, guilt-induced world of religion as he captures the raw essence of New Testament relationship. Reading this book feels like a conversation with Jesus over coffee— simple, profound, biblical, yet completely opposite of what I’ve learned from America’s polluted version of Christianity. Every year, one book grabs my attention and speaks to my soul. A Contrarian’s Guide to Knowing God is this year’s book."

-CRAIG GROESCHEL, Author of Chazown and Confessions of a Pastor, Senior Pastor of LifeChurch.tv, Oklahoma City


"Larry Osborne puts into words what many of us have wondered about for years but never had the courage to voice publicly. This book affirms us as individuals with unique personalities, learning styles, and gifts while offering sound counsel on the importance of deepening our relationships with God and with each other. A Contrarian’s Guide to Knowing God gives us permission to trade our feelings of spiritual inferiority for the confidence to pursue a life with God at the very center of who we are and how we choose to live each day."

-LINDA STANLEY, Director of Next Generation Pastors Leadership Community, Leadership Network


"I’ve heard all my life that God created each of us uniquely. Larry opened my eyes to the truth that God desires us to know and follow Him as an expression of that uniqueness. With a keen mixture of wit, wisdom, and God’s word, A Contrarian’s Guide to Knowing God provides a refreshing and insightful look at how the “average guy” can enjoy a meaningful, guilt-free relationship with God."

-CHIP HENDERSON, Senior Pastor of Pinelake Church Brandon, Mississippi


"As a pastor of a church where the average age is twenty-six, I am always looking for down-to-earth resources that will encourage spiritual growth for the “normal people” who come to our church. This book will be at the top of our resource list! Whether you are a seasoned believer or a seeker, A Contrarian’s Guide to Knowing God: Spirituality for the Rest of Us will challenge, encourage, and move you to follow Jesus."

-DARRIN PATRICK, Founding Pastor of The Journey, St. Louis


"Larry Osborne has mapped out a brand-new path for spiritual formation in A Contrarian’s Guide to Knowing God. This is one of the only books I know that takes you on the path to God without insisting that you be more disciplined and more structured, and that you read a lot more. Finally, a book for the rest of us!"

-DAVE FERGUSON, Coauthor of The Big Idea, Lead Pastor and Spiritual Entrepreneur and Community Christian Church and NewThing Network, Chicago


"If you’ve ever thought you were the only one challenging a cookie-cutter approach to faith, you need to read this book. Thank God! Osborne shows us how our relationship with God is not a one-size-fits-all approach."

-BILL EASUM, Easum-Bandy Associates, Coauthor of Go Big and Beyond the Box


"Larry Osborne has always seen things a little differently. His fresh look at the church has led to a multisite revolution; now Larry gives us a fresh look at spiritual life that is just as helpful and thought provoking. I highly recommend it."

-ROBERT LEWIS, Coauthor of Culture Shift and The Church of Irresistible Influence, Founder of Men’s Fraternity and Pastor-at-large at Fellowship Bible Church, Little Rock


"Larry challenges current notions of spiritual development in a healthy and thoughtful way. Whether you are beginning your journey with God or have been at it a long time, this book will be a powerful blessing and guide."

-BOB ROBERTS JR., Founder of Glocalnet, Senior Pastor of NorthWood Church, Fort Worth, Texas